CLOSE TO THE EDGE
Guilt.....it consumes me. I wish I could let it go. I feel guilty about so many things. This is why I push myself so hard. I never want to let anyone down. I don’t want my kids to go without anything because of my chronic pain. I don’t want to let my manager down at work because of my brain fog. I don’t want to let my friends down when they invite me out because of my fatigue. Then I feel guilty for wondering why these same people don’t understand what I’m going through when I don’t like to talk about it. I want to be normal so I act normal. I am fighting this battle with my body but don’t want to let others know. This makes my battle even more difficult. I know I need to let go of the guilt and leave it behind. I know those around me know I am doing the best I can. I know pushing myself beyond my limits is making things worse and therefore I am losing the battle. I don’t need to feel guilty. I am supported. I have the help. I need to ask for it. I don’t need to be alone. I think anyone suffering needs to know, let go of the guilt and embrace what you are able to accomplish. And it’s okay to ask for help. Free yourself of the burden of guilt and watch how your life changes. Life is precious, don’t waste your energy.